He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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