Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
