I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
