Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
