its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
