I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize