K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
