My nipple is on Facebook.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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