Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
