after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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