in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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