Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
