so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
