haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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