But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
No subtext here. People are naked.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize