good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
