Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
