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• (614): View more from Ohio

  Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.

  Fav 4 1157 1958

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• (858): View more from California

  Fuck U Mike is a golden god.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Mike give steph back her phone.

  Fav 9 3619 982

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.

  Fav 5 919 4336

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.

  Fav 4 2046 849

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator

  Fav 12 1088 2779

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.

  Fav 5 792 2248

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.

  Fav 7 2032 1107

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.

  Fav 11 2979 796

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (763): View more from Minnesota

  I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.

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• (805): View more from California

  It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!

  Fav 5 1734 854

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• (408): View more from California

  This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually

  Fav 2 970 606

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye

  Fav 0 474 656

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.

  Fav 1 440 507

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.

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