I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
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