Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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