News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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