We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
