He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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