Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Randomize
