Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
where are my eyebrows?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize