Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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