Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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