Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
