Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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