OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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