Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
