this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
