If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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