Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
