oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize