I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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