Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
