she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I just gift wrapped bread.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
