you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You may now shotgun with the bride
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
