Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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