My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
