IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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