If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
