Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
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