i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
