I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Randomize
