Is it normal to miss your booty call?
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
