New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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