My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
he was CRYING into my vagina
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
