I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
