even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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