Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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